hi! just reach home . went to simpang bedok with ben and eddy. i really miss the old times hanging out with them. told them that shiva dont like me hanging out and there's once when shiva delete the photo that me and eddy took together. and ben said dont hang out with him together , lol! but eddy said we two very long alr. i really wished i can tell them everything. i did not hide my sad face about what had happened this months to the both of them. and ben knows that im one of a kind when he asked about shiva. hmmm, and i told them, it's hard to tell anyone all these probs. eddy said he know that i have difficulties, and ben say i can just share. but they are guys, it's hard to share. ALTHOUGH THEY ARE NOT THOSE GUYS WHO GOSSIPS LIKE GIRLS! yeah, really luckily that i have them. and guess what, cause last time, as im really that dumb, as shiva dont like me hanging out with guys, i cannot even meet them, so they did not contact me, cause they wont know which side i will join, as if them or shiva, and they say they respect my decision. Good right, sigh! i really really wish that i hadnt know shiva they all in the first place, i really regret everything. and then we talk, and talk, and talk. and even had ice cream. they paid for all my food, and they even treated me ice cream, and even accompany to the bus stop where they are supposed to be in the opposite one, and have to walked a long way to cross the road and walk to that bus stop, after seeing me getting up the bus! sigh! but when we pass by tanah merah mrt to use the toilet, we went to the other side of the main road, and we saw one teacher and her children, then her boy suddenly appear when we turn around the corner, and i hold eddy hand cause of the small boy cause scared we bang into him, and then ben who had walked in front of us, suddenly turn back and saw, and he thought we holding hand. stupid ben. haha, and then we talk about the past and we walk to a long road to another bus stop to take bus.:) i really felt depressed those few months, and even when nothing had happened, and when im just sitting in the bus, i could just wept like a lot of things happen. and today , when eddy sms me to ask ben, i did not reply his msg, neither did i msg ben. but they both call me instead. and get me to meet them. i really really miss the old times with them, if only nothing had happened. and we even talk about something, and it actually connected to what had happened to me. but didnt talked much about it. hmm. and we planned to either watch movie, or ice skating and do roller blading next week. at least, im really at peace with them.